Review: 'Lotus' & Christina's Genius Scheme

 

I have this grand theory that Christina Aguilera is trolling the living shit out of all of us. She is just releasing this sub-par music so that we lower our expectations for future releases then BAM! She comes out with a flawless album that forces us to our knees, bowing at her greatness. At least, that's what I hope is happening. That's the only way to explain how someone who gave us albums as powerful as Back to Basics and Stripped deliver two albums that are as dated as they are boring. Lotus follows in the directly in the footsteps of Bionic, delivering tracks that would be great if they were release 3 years ago. Even one of the stronger tracks on the album, "Let The Be Love," struggles to keep up with radio killers like "Where Have You Been," "Die Young" and "Starships."

That said, Lotus isn't by no means a bad album... just a bit disappointing. Christina herself claims that her music is "ahead of it's time," but my guess is that she's still living in the early 2000s when she was at her most relevant. Years later and Bionic is still just OK. Nothing special. Lotus will probably suffer the same fate. The album only has a couple of stand out tracks and the rest just kind of sound like filler.

Most notably, the vocals on the album are phenomenal. Even when her voice is auto-tuned into oblivion, you can't help but marvel at how much control she has when she's not yelling over her lower register. She's obviously a great singer with a lot of depth and soul just waiting to shatter every glass in a 5 mile radius. Tracks like "Sing For Me" fit into the category of Christina's heavyweight tracks like "You Lost Me" or "Hurt" where she shows off her range, almost taunting her female peers who have fallen deeper and deeper computerized vocals and catchy chants that ignore the vocal acrobatics that where so popular in the 90s and early 00s. I just wish that transferred to the productions which are ultimately where the album falters. A lot of the electrifying beats absolutely wash out her creamy vocals.

Lyrically, the album is the second installment of a big "fuck you" to anyone who doesn't care for her infamously bitchy personality. Instead of filling tracks with lyrics about how big of a bitch she is, (See: "Vanity") she takes the Minaj approach and just suggest haters "suck my dick!" (See: "Shut Up") Instead of trying to rule the world (See: "Prima Donna"), she just throws up a middle finger to whoever is against her. (See: "Circles")

At the end of the day, it's still Christina Aguilera we're talking about. I have ridiculously high expectations for her because I know what she's capable of. I just hope her delusional fans stop enabling this half-decent music she's putting out so she'll see that sometimes letting the label share creative control isn't an awful thing. She obviously has a problem with authority and does her own thing, which is admirable, but when your career suffers because of it you have to step back and reevaluate if you really know what your fans want or if you know how to gain new ones. I really want her to calm down the ego, hire a new, younger manager and work with some up and coming producers. I'm tired of hearing her talk about how amazing her music is. I want to hear some amazing music. Lotus is far from amazing.

(6 out of 10 Stars)