The Zombie Apocalypse Soundtrack

You should know by now that I'm totally terrified of the Zombie Apocalypse, but I'm also super prepared. Now with questionable happenings like drugged up face eating meth heads in Miami, a flesh eating bacteria outbreak that eats away at your brain leaving you with ghoulish features and the dancing during the first part of the Femme Fatale Tour, I'm really starting to prepare for the worst.

Now what kind of music blogger would I be if I didn't immediately put together a bitchin' and corny playlist for of songs with cannibalistic or buffy-the-vampire-slayer-ass-kicker references? Probably a normal one, but lord knows I'm not that.

So when big cities are torn down and riddled with zombies, countryside estates are up in flames and Adele is still managing to sell 50,000 albums a week, at least you'll have some jams to groove to. Mega special thanks to my babe over at ElectroLov3 for helping me compile the tracklist!

Britney Spears - "Scary" (Nick & Paco Graveyard Groove Remix)

You can't tell me that you won't be scared when this shit goes down. Seriously.

Ke$ha - "Cannibal"

If you still have a sense of humor after all this and you want to play a prank on your friends, cue this song and pretend like you're in a music video. Just hope your friends know you're kidding and don't shoot you in the face.

Rihanna - "Disturbia"

This song is already creepy. If you just want to add some ambiance to walking around in the dark, this is the perfect track.

Madonna - "Gang Bang"

If you think this will all be like Walking Dead and you'll luck into finding you significant other at a campsite just out of town, you're sadly mistaken. Chances are when you do find them, they'll have someone's blood dripping flesh in their mouth. This song will be great for putting a bullet in the frontal lobe.

Kanye West - "Monster" (Featuring Rick Ross, Jay-Z, Nicki Minaj & Bon Iver)

 

Let the zombies know who's boss! You're a crazy beheading machine and you're not taking their shit. 

Sidenote: Do zombies shit or do they just eat until the flesh is force out of their anus?

Steve Aoki & Angger Dimas - "Beat Down" (Featuring Iggy Azalea)

When a zombie gets all in your face lookin' at you the wrong way and you feel like the bitch needs to be put in their place, cue this song... bring out your inner hood rat.

Jay-Z - "99 Problems"

The bitch isn't a problem because he or she is probably dead. Therefore the song does not lose its' meaning.

Sleigh Bells - "Demons"

This song is perfect for encountering a whore of zombies. It might give you a boost of confidence. Bitching rock anthems are always best when you're outnumbered, but don't expect to go all Kill Bill. I doubt you're a highly skilled ninja assassin.

Simon Curtis - "Flesh"

For all the necrophiliacs out there. If rotting zombie dick is your thing, then you'll want to play this song. 

Remember, wrap it up! It's suck to survive the outbreak then die from a burning urethra.

Lady Gaga - "Teeth"

Does anyone else feel like Gaga will have her own gang of hipster zombies ruling the streets of LA? That'd be a total badass video!

Marina & the Diamonds - "Living Dead"

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Natalia Kills - "Zombie" (Kleerup Remix)

Just to remind you that your relationship already sucked so the fact that you're alone now makes no difference.

Hilary Duff - "Danger"

This is one of those "no shit, Sherlock" tracks.

Nicola Roberts - "Take A Bite"

Probably not something you want to heckle at a zombie, honestly.

Christina Aguilera - "Not Myself Tonight"

If you get bit, do the entire world a hilarious favor. Unplug your headphones and hit repeat on this track. At least when I find you and blow your brains out, I'll get a good laugh.

Britney Spears - "Till The World Ends" [The Femme Fatale Remix Featuring Nicki Minaj & Ke$ha]

 

I hypothesize that if Britney dances like she did during the promo trail for Femme Fatale the zombies will think she's one of them. That's enough to get me to drive to California, find her and ask her why she really shave her head. Yes, that sole desire is making me persevere and fight for my life. 

What songs are on your Zombie playlist? I swear, if someone says "Thriller," make sure you get the zombies dancing on YouTube!