Rivals: Beyoncé vs. Rihanna

A little predictable, I know... but you've got to admit, their fans go at it like their lives are at stake! Grammy Awards vs #1s on Billboard. Forbes placement vs Maxim Hot 100 placement. Album sales vs single sales. It never ends!

Round 1: Sales and Accolades

Rihanna is a powerhouse on the Billboard Hot 100. She's notched eleven #1 singles, nine as lead artist, in the US and has recently began conquering the UK! She's also grabbed a handful of Grammy Awards and People's Choice Awards. But Rihanna's issue is very apparent; She doesn't have a #1 album. I don't care what anyone says! If you have over 20,000,000 Twitter followers and nearing 60,000,000 Facebook likes, but you can't convince a 10% of them to buy your album so you can be #1, you're not doing something right. Beyoncé has outsold Rihanna's album discography with her first album alone (in the US, according to the RIAA). Even her lowest selling album went #1 in it's first week. Beyoncé also has, which has fans will remind you every five-fucking-minutes, 16 Grammy Awards (which at least means she has a shit ton of friends in the industry) and was named Billboard's "Artist of the Millennium" (though I still think they only did that so she'd come and perform there). Bey's problem is opposite Rihanna's. She has Britney Spears syndrome, like, bitch where are all of your #1 singles at? 

So this is all about Rihanna's singles vs Beyoncé's albums. We'll hold off on touring for another round.

Expertise from Mikey of That Grape Juice on which is more important:

Album sales, by far. Though in today's age, singles carry way more weight than when you and I were kids. Rihanna's singles I feel like are more ubiquitous than Beyonce's albums on a grand scale, and thats not to take away from Beyonce.

I think at this point Rihanna has sold SO many sngles, that to call her a single's artist (in a derogatory way) is moot point now. "Single's Artist" will become "a thing" in the next wave of musical trends and industry practices. Rihanna will forever be the template.  

Single sales are important. It shows that you can deliver exactly what radio (the people) want at that time and for Rihanna it also shows how versatile her music is. It takes more than just a pop hit to be #1 on the Hot 100. You also have to have crossover appeal to Hot AC, Urban, Rhythmic and any other possible charts. Rihanna has massive crossover appeal... but you don't make money selling singles like you do selling albums. Also, for Beyoncé to have so many less #1 singles, she has a lot of weeks at #1 which shows her longevity. In short, Beyoncé's music is more likely to stand the test of time while Rihanna is just releasing music that is "hot right now." 

Gotta give the first round to Beyoncé 

Round 2: Talent

This is a no-brainer. No offense to Rihanna, but Beyoncé clearly shines in the vocal and dance category. I'm not going to say Rihanna can't sing, but I've heard some live performances that sound identical to goat birth. I'm also not going to say Rihanna can't dance, but you can compare her "pat-de-cake" with Bey's iconic "Single Ladies" coochie crank. Hell, Bey herself isn't the greatest dancer in the industry, but she can at least hold an eight-count and isn't afraid to drop down to the ground and swing her wig like it's full of scorpions.

In the acting world neither of these ladies have been impressive. Rihanna's role in Battleship, which was an awful movie, was honestly too short to judge, but looked like she has hope. Beyoncé, on the other hand is not convincing as anyone but herself. Hearing her curse in Obsessed and Cadillac Records was uncomfortable. Then there was that weird scene in Dreamgirls where she tried to convince Jennifer Hudson to turn her wig around that made me cringe. She is only convincing when she has to get ghetto. Sadly, her best role is still as Foxxy Cloepatra from Austin Powers in Goldmember.

Still, until Rihanna takes home an Oscar or two, her acting won't be enough to save her.

This round goes to Queen Bey

Round 3:  The Navy vs The Bey Hive

This is a battle of the crazies because that's all these fans are. The Bey hive is the perfect name for Beyoncé's fans. I dare you to get caught on Twitter saying something negative about their Queen. They will drown your mentions with furious bashing. Sure, they don't argue with facts and if you're pay attention they like to make shit up, but it's so overwhelming you'll probably just end up logging off.

They don't make up as much shit as Rihanna stans, though. I once had a member of The Rihanna Navy tell me that Rihanna had sold 100 million records in the US. I almost peed on myself, but it was even funnier because they we 100% sure of themselves. I've dated Rihanna stans. 3 of them. Those bitches will slash your tires! They're crazy!

Expertise from Courtney of Punch Bowl Blog on both bases and their delusions:

The Beyhive... they believe Beyoncé is the creator of music! The Navy thinks that #1s are all that matters.

These fan bases are actually pretty similar and are among the most celebrated fan bases by their favorite artist... but if you look at the social numbers, the Rihanna Navy outnumbers the Bey Hive by far and I think if stanning was a real life war, the Rihanna stans would bath if the blood of the Bey stans. I just wish them bitches would buy an album or two.

First point for Rihanna!

Round 4: Beauty & Sex Appeal

Let me start of by saying beauty and sex appeal are two very different things. Beyoncé epitomizes the words beauty and class (in public). She's never seen out of her 7-inch heels, always looks regal at award shows and has a smile that glows as bright as Nicki Minaj's wig collection. 

Rihanna, on the other hand, is one of the sexiest women on earth, and a staple of Maxim's Hot 100. She's almost always completely naked, but even when she's wearing clothes there's just something about her that oozes "sex." 

This is tough because they both play both sides of the fence very well. When Beyoncé dirtied up her image during the Sasha Fierce era, she was a force to be reckoned with. Plus, Bey had a sizzling shoot that landed her on the cover of Sport's Illustrated's Swimsuit Issue. When Rihanna dress up for events, she's also very beautiful. She could wear a potato sack and make it couture. She is also an astounding model, landing high fashion shoots in Vogue in just about every country.

When comparing Beyoncé's beauty to Rihanna's sex-appeal, I have to go with Rihanna. I compared some of their magazine covers side by side and almost every time I was more attracted to the Rihanna cover. Also, watching some of their videos, even though Rihanna doesn't quite dance like Beyoncé, the way she moves is mesmerizing... or it could be the reflection from her forehead.

Round 4 for Rihanna.  

Round 5: Star Power

Star power is hard to define. It's a crazy mix of everything from touring power to critical acclaim. You have to take industry respect into consideration as well as negative press and controversy. Which name is more recognizable around the world? Which artist will still be around in 15 or 20 years? Which artist will be in our history books?

Let's face it. Rihanna is, at this point, probably the most recognized name in the world (aside from Lady Gaga, perhaps). She was able to go from a completely island flop to the biggest name in pop music by far. She has become a template for creating radio hits and videos. She also apparently has the most powerful pussy in the world, according to Drake and Chris Brown.

However, you can't discount Beyoncé's incredibly history which includes everything from signing for the President of the USA and working with the First Lady on multiple occasions to being one of the most awarded artist of all time. There is just so many things she's done that proves she's not just an artist or a celebrity, she's an icon. The "Single Ladies" phenomena was one of the greatest social movements of all time!  I don't think there is anyone from this generation of artists who is more celebrated than Bey. Even with haters calling her Ctrl+Concé for all the supposed thievery, you can't bring her down.

With that said, Round 5 goes to Beyoncé and we have the winner of our first Rivals battle! 

Now, for the fun part! Let us know your thoughts in the comment section and hit us up on Twitter for more discussions. Also be on the look out for Mister Martian's opinion of the matter in the first installment of Live From Mars TV coming at the end of this week.

Next Tuesday Rivals Continues with the Battle of the Scream Queens! Care to guess who we're talking about? The lineup: Beyoncé, Ke$ha, Lady Gaga, Jennifer Lopez, Kylie Minogue, Carrie Underwood, Nicki Minaj, Shakira, Katy Perry, Britney Spears, Taylor Swift, Christina Aguilera, Madonna and Rihanna!